To distract myself from the presidential race, I’ve been obsessing lately about another drama, also of national import and urgency. I refer to former Patriots coach Bill Belichick, 72, dating Jordan Hudson, 24.

24! 72! Hike?

She is a graduate of Bridgewater State, where she was a cheerleader and concurrently finished cosmetology school. She joined an elite cheer team afterward, exuding considerable pep and heavy makeup.

He is from, umm, another era. You would think that his idea of a romantic evening would be dusting off the Kodak film projector and watching 1958 New York Football Giants highlights. (Sounds dreamy to me, Bill, but young people usually prefer streaming channels that confound us oldsters. May you never suffer the indignity of trying to find an online rom-com with the garage door opener.)

I am not one to judge (I’m lying), but I bring certain concerns about old men romancing girls less than half their age. Since the subject of math has come up, you could divide their ages in two and presto — young coach Belichick, often seen with a football playbook, would be 36. Hudson, 12, might be clutching The Babysitters Club.

But, again, I am not one to judge. (I’m lying, again).

Online comments about this May-Very-Late-December romance are mixed. Some observers, leaning toward the lonely male demographic, say they are both adults, so leave them alone. Others, both men and women, think money and celebrity might be more in play than the 72-year-old male physique and personality. Many of that age have more in common with the late Walter Matthau (Grumpy Old Men) than the heart-throbs du jour.

I should know. I will be one later this year. A 72-year-old man, not a heart-throb.

I can’t recall ever getting fan mail from a 24-year-old, since most have only a vague idea of what a newspaper is. I recall that once a young woman told me she likes — maybe she used the word loves — my writing, but that was all.

Still, I walked around in a happy daze for hours.

What, I ask myself, would I have to offer a girl of a mere 24 years? Although I am not a military buff, I’m at an age where World War II seems ever-more fascinating. I would tell her I love sunsets, and long walks on the beach where we could talk about Dunkirk.

I could take her to rock concerts, I suppose. Do any of them start at 4 o’clock? Is it OK if we leave a little early to beat traffic? Or if it’s too loud?

She’d have to know that we’re going to watch Jeopardy! every night after the evening news. A man’s got to have his routines.

Speaking of that, is she OK with seeing me with a big orange glass full of Metamucil? (A mature woman would know what I’m talkin’ about!)

How long should I wait before telling her about last year’s heart bypass surgery? I didn’t take any selfies, wasting a chance to go viral. Is she willing to help me choose my Medicare supplemental policy? A young person’s perspective might be hella helpful.

I suppose it’s not meant to be. The fact is that the older I get, the better actress Helen Mirren looks. Did you see her sling that shotgun in 1923, the Western drama? That was fire! As a hardcore Downton Abbey fan, I’m not quite into Violet Crawley, Dowager Countess of Grantham territory yet, but I bet she would be fun to have over for high tea.

But really, who am I to judge those who rob the cradle? (For the record, Bellichick was around 48 when Hudson was born.) To which I add, Yikes!

Just don’t have any kids, Coach. We recently watched our under-1 granddaughter for about six hours, and we were as exhausted in the end as the Dunkirk evacuees. The baby lost faith in my logistics and leadership early, and Dede’s more capable command collapsed in the final desperate hour, when our little trooper wailed and tears fell all around us. Vivi wanted out, and only parental reinforcements averted utter defeat.

When a topic is too deep for you (that is, me) it’s always good to turn to William “What fools these mortals be” Shakespeare. He was pretty tough on old codgers:

“And as with age his body uglier grows,

So his mind cankers.”

— The Tempest

“When sapless age and weak unable limbs

Should bring thy father to his drooping chair.”

— Henry VI

But some Belichick defenders might ask, “How many Super Bowl rings did that bard ever have?” As for me, I still give the edge to Shakespeare. And Tom Brady, mayhaps.

Dan Mackie lives in West Lebanon. He can be reached at dan.mackie@yahoo.com.